so it was off to meet timothy goh for some sort of a catching up session. talked abt church and stuff like that. i cant say much to that.. cause i mean, its very hard to make a stand when it comes to religion. or at least for me. on that day, i can say: yeah! i commit everything. but do i really make that leap to do so!? ok yeah, maybe i do still pray everyday night b4 i go to bed. but i know its not enough. but the driving force that compels me to continue to pray is something so supernatural. its like i know He's there! but yet, i dwell into sin.
so then i headed down to school, where i had the time of my life, laughing at how foc ran their camp! i mean.. i'm glad i didnt make the leap! after all that contemplating and stuff... i mean... i must say i'm so fortunate to stay in Sports camp. yeah maybe there was some screw ups here and there, but that was between the commitee... and like the main emphasis should be on the freshies... which foc did not really pay attention to. from what i've heard.. and to those reading this who might feel offended, esp if ur from Student Union - i think there should be a wake up call. look at it this way, i hear.. that by the 2nd night, 100+ freshies have booked out. ok maybe this is exaggerating, but if lets say we put the exaggeration to truth, there can be no more than 50 freshies that left. but that still is a GINORMOUS figure. i would be concerned. ok... so yeah.. maybe i'm bias towards sports camp and student sports council, but hell, who would like to be in the shoes of the CC or gl in foc - if a freshie comes up to u and say, hey, i'm gonna book out cause this is quite boring and its not to my expectation. my gosh, i would just die! so yeah, FOC was given such a huge amount of money to spend. did they spend it wisely!? yeah sure they did! but i guess the only decision gone wrong, was the number of people going! think abt it! 600 signed up. so even if they split them into 10 groups, there will be 60 per group. ok, give and take the possibility some dont show up, there will be 45 per group. and i'm having games. how the hell do u fit 45 freshies into a game that requires thinking, comments, sharing of ideas! its like 45 heads cramping together, to come up with 1 solution! and theres bound to be conflict! or rather! slowwwwwwwwww........ but thats that... cause from what i hear from my freshies... they arnt really having a ball of a time! haha besides that... i have to comment on how foc gls actually "control" their freshies. so anyway, i was walking ard, and a group walked pass, and to my amazement, bobbie was there and so were a few or rather a lot of sc ppl there... so i pulled them out so i could talk... so b4 30seconds was up.. fiona.. the gl.. game walking towards our group... getting ready to put up a fight... ok.. yeah maybe it was wrong for me to invade into their path to their destination. but shit man! they are 17 years old! any one at that age, who is sane, would have the brains to run back to the group after our short conversation! its not like i'll be as dumb to sit them down to have a cup of coffee.. its the conflict between sc and su i tell u! but anyway.. i just laugh it off and think, its ridiculous. so... besides that........... to those who might be offended... well... i'm pretty straight forward i guess =). true friends do stab you by the front! and i think i did exactly that. so if u really feel i need to be more constructive. leave a tag or a comment. ill right another post. oh yeah, feel free to talk abt sports camp too on this blog too... i mean, i'm open to all suggestions. and u might ask why...? cause maybe.. just maybe.... ill take ur comments positively.. and i probably would.
so it was training today which was so great. the fact that i didnt gym for a week cause of sc.. made me treasure todays training so much =)
mom's still giving me the cold treatment.. and itll last a long time.. cause i've still not changed. i;m still coming back late... i'm still not with the family. do i feel guilty? yeah i do! do i feel that i should? yeah i do! then why do i still stay out and treat the home just like a sleeping ground and nothing else!? because its the holidays! and because ive spent the rest of my life at home anyway!. so maybe i dont appreciate the stuff home has to offer. and well yeah i can be blamed for that. but dont go telling me i'm at fault to say that this family is a family! cause it aint! its crumbling and i know so. cause the 2 person i should be looking up to, mom and dad, are disfunctional! and i'm glad, throughout my life, through 18 years of it.. i can now really rationalize what is a stable and happy family, and the other. to say that this family is happy, is wrong! to say its sad, yeah most definately. do i feel sad.? more angry than sad. and i thank God so much, i dont show it as much as i should! i still put up my happy face=). and i know.. i'm happy without the troubles in my life.
kudos to life
posted by jonathan @ 1:07 AM
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