almost 2 weeks have past since skateboard party began, and ive failed to actually account the events that went down. well, here's my chance to redeem myself of all the times ive been 'away' on msn and well away from home.
apart from all the everyday routine of hard liquor and fixing up a smoke, whether cigarrettes or the daily specials of cigars, alot of the quality time spent went into deep conversation, which ive craved for, for a long long time. never did i thought 4 years ago, when i met this bunch of misfits, that they'd be my greatest friends. not only was there lots of talks and booze and everything that hurts the body, we had a daily routine of channel surfing till we finally settled on channel 27 to enjoy, to lament, during the FIFA WORLD CUP.
but most of all, as much talk we go into, it never fails to amaze me that these bunch of good friends ive been talking about have changed so much. often related to heart breaks, or heart aches.
for example, nick. 21 year old and always a father figure in our whole group. use to always cover our backs, the party planner, the boss, the one to stop us from doing anything stupid. but ever since his break up with laura up in melbourne, he came back a very different man. it almost seems he's desperately in need of some affection that he spent 3 years building up with laura. and i dont blame the guy, 3 years is pretty long considering most of my friends usually break off after 2. so, he's no more father figure, and i mean, i feel so sorry for this guy who i spent a month with up in melbourne when we were at our prime and enjoying life to the best it has to provide. poor guy's shoving 5 sticks consecutively and smoking his life away. it's not even social, its a chain now. drinking is his means of getting away from his problems.
then there's charles, host of the party, and a really great guy. he's my age and i mean, he's probably one person who i could relate to so well with considering we've been brought up almost identically, just that maybe he has remained financially stable. he had been in a relationship with sam for maybe since sec2 and well, he's gotten over it quickly but i just feel that there's something left in him to keep on with the smoking and drinking. well i wont go into that. these are just typical examples.
my main point is, even after all this heart breaks that theyve been through, is it even worth it go drink and smoke the days away? and even so, resulting to a 'player' mode which i often question. it's sad to see all this happen in a span of 2 weeks. and it isnt helping my body either. i drink religiously every night now that ive crashed charles' place almost every day, and smoking?
i'm not saying i do not have problems. i do! but i do question myself whether getting myself into these vices would help me.
the crew needs a new father figure, where has it gone. we're all a mess
that aside, we still had a ball of a time just laughing the days away.
a more feminine approach to things.
i'd like some great company
posted by jonathan @ 11:27 AM
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