i'm hungry. are you?: July 2006

Thursday, July 27, 2006

JASON, YOU WILL GET YOUR BEER.

canteen one? soya bean milk

green turtles

sorry for the delay, it seems ive been procrastinating so much, that it slipped my mind to actually blog. well anyway, an interesting fact today, is that, ive been training for the 11th time a row. it's a surprise that i still have my limps on me. =)

so it was a zouk night out with keith and hanxiong last night with a bunch of pjc girls who ive never met until yesterday, and regret knowing, for 1, they were quite unfriendly, but that wasnt the part that brought my whole perspective of mambo nights into the drain. phuture on weds night is too blown out! i could stand on any place in the phuture(provided i can actually squeeze through) and not move at all. we were as good as packed sardines. ok maybe it was just last night, but i found no reason as to why it should be that packed!? the special occasions have gone already. what's with the crowd? netheless, the best part would have to be just chilling out with my main man jason kant, of who is off my blackbook. so i dont mind chilling out with him again. HEAR THAT BITCH!

i was going through some old songs from my past libraries, and i stumbled upon a kick ass song, well, not really but it is one with lyrics, that could just be good as words of advice.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’99
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by
scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own meandering
experience…I will dispense this advice now. Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you
imagine. Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing everyday that scares you Sing Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
people who are reckless with yours. Floss Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes
you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with
yourself. Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you
succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements. Stretch Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your
life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t. Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone. Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children,maybe
you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…what ever you do, don’t
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your
choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people
think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever
own.. Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them. Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for
good. Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you
should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
knew when you were young. Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live
in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will
philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize
that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one
might run out. Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will
look 85. Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than
it’s worth. But trust me on the sunscreen…

interesting eh. yeah a little long, but i mean. it does mean alot does it =).

so its back to ccta projects now. ive got so much to tell, but so little time. toodles my loves

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

EXPLODE

my lecturer Dr Wayne Forday said today during a lecture on fat metabolism that every macdonald's french fries i eat, shortens my life by 5 mins.
silence
hahaha i should be already dead!

during our training at kallang as we were collecting our life vests for a programme of canoeing, chee cheong made a very retarded comment on how shitting and ragged our lifevests were..
silence
"ill sink faster in this shit"

sherlyn and i were walking towards the bukit timah market while we suddenly stumbled across the topics about insects and how they freak us out.
silence
"the mosquito web is damn freaky"

and now, in case jason is reading this, i have to exaggerate the point that WE HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH EACH OTHER ANYMORE FOOL! after the 40 dollars that u have returned, we have nothing! it was arrogance! arrogance cost you this shit! and after all the loving and chicks ive been introducing to your sorry ass, u treat me like this! u cock!
silence
"eh, we still cool? can help me out?"

so anyway, i'm coughing like a mad man. i need to see a doctor. FARK AGAIN!!!!

n-LARGE

Thursday, July 13, 2006

rendezvous

looky looky, ive been able to stay away for my lectures now! and it's full speed attack till the exams. feel pretty good abt myself. I'M ACTUALLY LEARNING SOMETHING!

so anyway, my weds evening was pretty much spent on my I&E, which i can proudly say, IVE PASSED BITCH! and well.. this is for you all 5 days a week students to lament on... i'm now on a 4 day week! sorry pals! and i'll brag abt it, and you all aint gonna shut me up. dinner with sherlyn, and then we both we on to meet up with charles, nick, peh eh and evan for pirates of the caribbean, which we didnt get seats for because we were slightly late.. shack.. so me sherlyn and evan headed home as the rest went to charles's place to chill out before the 2am show at cine.

so it's zouk this sat with mark and his friends.. i hear the crowd is different, so i;m goign with high expectations.

so anyway, i'm gonna enjoy the rest of my one day a week holiday now.. au revior

blood suckers

Monday, July 10, 2006

ITALY BITCH!

i'm super estatic over the win this morning that i've managed to stay awake through half my lectures today! now that's an achievement. but it didn't work well with me suddenly bursting in "ITALY!!!" every half-an-hour while the lecturer was talking. there goes my attitude marks =).

so anyway. on the way to charles place, as crazy as the guys could get high on air, we did the unthinkable. AGAIN. u see, mercedes benz have their 3 spoke logo onthe front and rolls royce, their little angel. for us, the skate-mobile... on behalf on skate party, WE HAVE VICKY! so the story goes somewhat like this.. vicky didnt want to get out of the front seat, which was previously occupied by charles, so through blackmail, charles placed his green tea on the ground outside the car while we stopped over at 7-eleven to grab some drinks. the ah-neh, took the bait got out of the van and went for the drink while we all locked the doors and got ready to go. the maniac of vicky, then jumped onto the bonet of the 10 year old van and sat there. like i said, as we were all hyped already and couldnt wait to get home to turn on the bloody tv to watch the match, we just drove off with him sitting on the bonet, from sixth ave to wilby. yes. it was illegal. but balls, it was sure fun to see his black ass being scared to bits.

so the world cup is over, and life has to get back to normal now... no more late nights and well, studying has to be priority now. shittttt.... what a time to end skate party =(.

so forgive my emo moods lately, i regret posting them up. but oh well.. my only output i guess. forgive me i ask.

'i forgot to breathe!'

Sunday, July 09, 2006

undefeated

i crave the day this will all go away now that the leash is throw on the ground. so besides feeling like crap most of the time, and drinking and smoking throughout the night, ive managed to seek some solace in the company of friends.

so as the day would pass again, i vow to drag myself out of this shack and refuse to have any thing get in my way. YEAH RIGHT! but we'll see how it goes. maybe a car would hit me and i wouldnt have to feel anymore. but for that instance if the deep impact doesnt slay me, id hope for the old woman in the car to step out and take her umbrella with her and beat the shit out of me till i become terminally and forever paralysed. if that still doesnt work, sorry world, i'm here to stay around to be the manice that ive been.

italy and france is gonna go on tonight! it's going to be the LAST DAY of the world cup series, and i'm so happy that life is gonna go back to normal.. wake up, school, eat, study, sleep. NO MORE WORLD CUP! GO ITALIA!

so fire away! the tanks are set and we're ready to go. prepare the horses, prepare the men. we're ready for that one goal. believe it or not, we were not prepared. because the breakdown was sudden, we were awaken. in succinct note, you better be informed. your present time is numbered, pandora box is opened. fraction of the sun, bullet in my gun.

my event preps are fucked. it's 3 days away, we dont have any participants and the time line has not been set. i'm fucked!

backdoor, backstab

Saturday, July 08, 2006

fulstop, next paragraph

the sun raises,
i'm awake,
i'm not supposed to be.
my chest is uneasy.
the start of another day.
it's going to slowly eat me up.
now dont you falter,
dont you grief.
'cause i am not worth,
your kind sympathy.
it's a new day.
it's a new day.
let go.

beneath skin, below the sky.
there's still something worth.
the beautiful mistake.
please set up a funeral for a friend.
turn smile shift repeat.
bring me on journey.
i'll be the passenger.
for hours.

can someone please tell me the story

tributes

so apart from being sad and mostly in deep thought today which started at 7 in the bloody morning, i managed to engage myself with some great company. of which i guess i'm quite thankful for. they kinda got me out of my low mood, and well, it doesnt get any better from there. i'm still feeling quite depressed though. the thoughts still run subconsciously at the back of my head, and i cant help it. but i guess it takes time. TIME TO HEAL. TIME DOES HEAL.

so after school i made my way to the db clubhouse for some house keeping, matters where my presense was deeply redundant. i was there to just take care of stuff, not to do the spick and spanning of the place. so then it was off to find sherlyn to go down to cathy to get her flops. pretty good company. afterall, she has been there to put up with my rants of the day. kudos to my #1 fan.

so then it was suppose to be off to skate, but my body was in too much pain and i was battered pretty much from ky's programme. i'm feeling it deeply! haha. so i went home, hoping that id get some time to relax.. but then bert called up. and i thought, maybe i should stay at home at all.. i might become suicidal and take a jump. so i left to meet up with him. and mark happened to be there too! so it was the 3 of us again, after a long long time! so hardly do we get enough time to catch up on old times. and well it was all worth while. we decided not to do anything stressful, but to walk down the outskirts of town to check out the nightlife, and to hunt for some good food. so to princep street and off we walked to find ourself at golden mile which was quite facinating, to the fact that we were caught in the middle of a thailand slizzy galore of trans and high pitched 'girls'. not exactly what we were looking for.so then we gave up and headed down to zion road.

so anyway. dinner was fine, just that now my life span has been shortened maybe 10 years odd because of the charkuayteow and oysteromelette. i think i'm going to die of high blood pressure or artherosclerosis. AHHH... fark...

so good food, great company, so downs.. this day's drama is wrapped up. good night

Friday, July 07, 2006

oh, gonna tear it apart, go back to the start

if life was such a tease, id rather stop wrecking it up.
every little scent and time i hold dearly.
only to let the feeble emotions get to me.
if it really mattered, a massacre of euphoria would have been expected.
if it really mattered, the doors of heart would have been ledged,
not closed, but to the walls where it would swing towards, and stuck such that nothing is kept. so that a child could even passby and even enter through.
but as blissful and relaxing i want it to be,
fuck it all, cause i'm not myself anymore.
it isnt going to be worth it all.
goodbye to hope, kick expectations skyhigh.
i still do care.
but it's up to you to unledge, and let a world of uncertainity pass through.
you mattered most, if you want to know.
my old worn wooden door is unshackled, you are always welcomed.
love, jon

how sweet, life could be. time falls like snow

Thursday, July 06, 2006

'ive got more chicks than kentucky'

idleness drove me back to sleep this afternoon to wake up at 3. my goodness, my body just cant sit still. i wonder what will happen if i'm put in a room alone with nothing and be left for a day. within the first 10mins, my hair might all be on the floor, cause i seriously need to do something if not i'll just explode, i thought it would have been a pleasant day if i just stayed at home to study or something, but procrastination and much of the 'who likes studying' attitude got to me, and i decided to leave to chill out with sherlyn, lisa chong and lionel for awhile. I SI-RI-UOUSLY THINK TEA PARTY IS OVER RATED. and because today i was especially restless, i couldnt take sitting down and talking about guys anymore, i just had to leave for school to gym. and gym i did with ky's programme. i feel much better and less depressed now, and i think gyming is such wonderful therapy!

everyone's so hype to bulk up now, and i guess there's no reason to resist. trainings gonna be 10 steps up and for me, i want the team to not just go for the win, more like the KILL. the guys common topic at the gym today was what sort of supplements to buy. i'm not exactly the sort who actually focuses so much on these, i just take protein and i'm happy. but after just now, i was just amazed. if the guys spent the amount of time on their course studies than on the details of supplements, i bet they'd ace on their results and get the coveted NGEE ANN KONGSI AWARD.

oh to my utmost surprise, i received a mail from np. and it indicated i was ineligible for the academic scholarship. i'm not exactly sad or anything. but i was just super stunned that i received it now! u see, i sent in the application like during last term's hols, and i get the reply now! i mean, ive already given up hope or gave any thought into it. i can imagine the admin staff just chucking my application at one corner or use it as a coffee cup coaster. and this reply letter, i bet if i scanned it with my very precise eyes, id probably can see coffee stains. WHERE WAS THE URGENCY!!?? keeping students in 'suspense' isnt such a good thing when it comes to money man! speaking of which, i ought to get my school fees ready. i made to pay an extra 40+ bucks because my account lacked the funds for any deduction of school fees to take place.

haha i'm quite fascinated with 'THE FLAMING LIPS' album, yoshimi battles the pink robots. they are a weird band, with a very catchy beat to their songs. sort of like modest mouse. but its so different. the whole album is like a story, based on a girl name yoshimi fighting the pink robots, and they describe all the the trials and tribulations she goes through, and then to attain victory. pretty cool. haha.

file>saveas>bitchass

pimpsinthecribma

hee haw

dropitlikeitshawwwt

colder than the winter

today was pretty much fucked up due to the fact i slept through my entire lectures and could not enter phuture and paid 20bucks to get into zouk for nothing. i thought the night would have been fun, and i thought id be just chilling out with the lads, but i mean, they all had their fun, and well, i didnt want their happy times to run by.

besides that, i just received an email from smrt saying my team has been rejected for the smrt challenge, and well i'm pretty much screwed for the term as the world cup has found a way to mess up my study schedule.

andrew got seriously pissed drunk just now as well, and i dont blame him.. after all it was the free alcohol that had killed him.

dinner was pretty good, ive finally been able to enjoy the simplicity of MOS burger since eons ago.

lost. who is to know what you're thinking when there's nothing truely valid for us to make a just assumption. i spend more time thinking about what the meanings of your actions are than i spend being awake in class. if it should not be continued, please inform. so i dont have to be in ponder every single waking morning of each day. because i know, an uninterested mind is better than one that causes misunderstandings.

throw me up

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

tactical

i found myself tearing on my monday when i sat in the lab idling away. it seemed the loss on sunday was too great. but on that night, you could see it, we're all awaken. the fire is reignited, and it's bigger like never before. we're all ready to take on what broke our spirits. but they could only take away so little. this TEAM, NPDB, is set. we're on one common goal. together.

aside from that, i'm dreading school so much now, ive suddenly lost the drive to study everyday, and even pay attention during lectures.. this is really bad. i need a slap.

and ITALY IS THROUGHT TO THE FINALS BITCHES!! for all u sceptics out there saying how powerful germany are, EAT THAT!

BAHHHHH

why do i do what i do

Sunday, July 02, 2006

2 July 2006

it's over. i'm feeling as destructive as ever. i'm sad. and i did give all. it took a span of almost 4 hrs to have the facts sink into my head. and now i'm tearing. if this was my best, i'd like to go mad instead then. what went wrong? i am proud for the team for they all did the same. and as the best was not enough, i'm only looking for the next chance to pass by to heat up the hype-o-meter and be insane for a purpose. for a gold.

i've now learnt the meaning of hardcore. and it's only the beginning. it was not by chance, not by luck that we had gone this far for the race, but it was by determination, hardwork. we deserved the place in the finals. but i know, we could have done better.

i'm charred. i'm scarred. i'm burning. i'm tearing.

it's not the end. i'm not gonna fuck up again. we are not going to do that again.

comatized

i'm hungry. are you?